Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt make out in Paris
Here’s Brad Pitt kissing Angelina Jolie in Paris, in the midst of filming her new movie The Tourist with 50 of his children in tow crying for milk or crapping in their pants at the same time. And while you might be tempted to think this was another show of solidarity, we genuinely think it was an effort on Brad Pitt’s part to remind her he was right there watching in case she got the urge to bang Johnny Depp (her co-star) in front of all the cast and crew. Which we’re pretty sure happened when Pitt was facing the other way trying to change a shitty diaper or a hundred.
Glambert Slams SuBo!
Did Angelina Jolie have plastic surgery?
Angelina Jolie was pictured in Venice a couple of days ago looking like alien parasites found shelter in her jawline and while some will speculate she had a neck lift procedure called The Ribbon Lift” we just think she got a bit too tense when officials at a Venetian orphanage saw her stuffing two orphans in her oversized bag like they were bread rolls in an all-you-can-eat buffet and told her to put the bag down and slowly walk away. What do you think?
Rihanna gets lap dance from porn star midget (with video)
Rihanna celebrated her 22nd birthday this past weekend at a surprise Phoenix bash thrown by her new boyfriend, L.A. Dodger Matt Kemp. Kemp presented Rihanna with a diamond necklace and what every 22-year old needs at that point in their life, a 3-ft porn-star/stripper ready to whip them into shape for being a bad, bad girl. Or maybe the slutty dwarf was really Kemp’s fantasy: a romantic dinner date with Rihanna and “Bridget The Midget” under the table taking care of his sleeping giant. This one’s a keeper, girl!
Is Chuck E. Cheese A Magnet For Trouble????
Of course it is! Yet another violent incident occurred at a Chuck E. Cheese over the weekend - this time in St. Louis! According to reports, a large fight broke out between adults at the Chuck E. Cheese near South County Mall around 7:15 pm on Saturday evening! Not enough goodie bags to go around?? Police originally believed there had been a shooting at the kiddie pizza parlor, but it was later confirmed that only fists, not bullets, were involved.
Olivia Wilde doggy-style in Elle Magazine
Here’s Olivia Wilde getting ready for a thorough rectal exam for Elle’s March issue, and we know most women will probably look at this and go “oh, that camisole looks so classy and that lace is heavenly, absolutely to die for”, but honestly, all we can think about is that we want to make a gynecological appointment just so we can sit at the waiting room and pretend to read these magazines. Although there is the danger of passing one of the patients for an ox and strangling it right there in front of the shocked receptionist. Can’t blame us for being spontaneous, can you now?
“Growing Pains” star gone missing
Former “Growing Pains” star Andrew Koenig, who played Boner on the ’80s TV show, has been reported missing.
“He went up to [Vancouver] to visit friends who last saw him on the 14th,” Danielle Koenig, his sister, told Zap2it.com, which was first to report the news. “Any information we can get on his whereabouts would be helpful.”
Stars including Sarah Silverman, Alyssa Milano and “Best Week Ever’s” Doug Benson have Tweeted about his disappearance, with television personality Dave Holmes reporting on his blog that Andrew missed his scheduled February 16 flight back to the U.S.
His parents, Walter (”Star Trek’s” original Pavel Chekov) and Judy Koenig, told TMZ that their son was “suffering from depression.”
“[He was] not doing good” at the time of his disappearance, they told the site, adding that they planned to fly to Vancouver in the coming days.
According to Walter and Judy, Andrew’s phone has been off.
They last had contact with him on February 9.
“I performed with Andrew for several years around Los Angeles,” friend and comedian Josh Feemster said in a statement to Access Hollywood. “He always had a passion for comedy and political activism. I really hope he’s OK. Not only for his sake, but for the sake of his family and friends.”
Individuals with information on the star’s location may contact Detective Raymond Payette of the Vancouver Police Department at (604) 717-2534.
What Kids Can Learn From Tiger's Apology
AP
As I heard Tiger Woods talk about his position as a role model (whether the words were his or scripted by some PR genius) it struck me how this moment would be absorbed by his young audience in particular. Nothing he said was particularly inappropriate -- the speech didn't contain explicit references, and teens know as well as anyone what it means to cheat on a partner.
But in this extraordinary moment, kids can see what they rarely do in the highly-managed, highly-spun world of pop culture: an idolized superhero in failure mode -- in crisis -- and earnestly trying to make amends. Kids learn more by example than by exhortation, and here I believe here they can learn a thing or two or seven that wouldn't have the same impact otherwise.
Below, some of Tiger's quotes and their potential impact on young people:
"I was unfaithful. I had affairs. I cheated. What I did is not acceptable. And I am the only person to blame."
When kids see Tiger accepting all the blame for his actions, they can learn what it means to own their decisions.
"I don't get to play by different rules. The same boundaries that apply to everyone apply to me…I thought I could get away with whatever I wanted to… I was wrong."
Kids will understand that no one -- not even superstars -- are above the law or above moral accountability.
"It's not what you achieve in life that matters, it is what you overcome... It is up to me to start living a life of integrity."
Kids can learn that failure is a function of being human; that you are ultimately measured by how you respond to it.
"My real apology to [Elin] will not come in the form of words. It will come from my behavior over time."
Kids can learn that true remorse is demonstrated through action, not apologies.
"I stopped living by the core values that I was taught to believe in."
Kids can understand the importance of having a core set of values.
"I will continue to receive help because I have learned that is how people really do change…That also means relying on others for help."
Kids will be encouraged to seek help when they're in physical or emotional trouble.
"When I do return, I need to make my behavior more respectful of the game... I ask you to find room in your hearts to one day believe in me again."
Kids will be reminded there's always a chance for redemption if you are willing to rehabilitate yourself.
16 of the SEXIEST PARIS HILTON Photo Poses
Tiger Is Going Back To Rehab?
Heading back so soon??? Por que??? Sources are claiming that after Tiger Woods makes his PGA Tour commissioner Tim Finchem explained the circumstances, saying: "As we understand it, Tiger's therapy called for a week's break at this time, during which he has spent a few days with his children and then will make his statement before returning. Accordingly, there was very little flexibility in the date for the announcement." What the what? We don't know if we fully believe this, but if it is true, perhaps it is for the best. He needs all the help he can get and maybe it's better to go back in hiding after his statement. We don't know a single soul who won't be talking about it for days after! [Image via WENN.]
heartfelt prepared speech today, apologizing to fans, friends, and family, he intends to go BACK to sex rehab.
What To Expect From Tiger's Press Conference?
LOLs!
Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Awards Nominations
Getty
Nickelodeon just announced the nominees for the 2010 Kids’ Choice Awards. In this annual telecast, finding out who wins the kids vote isn't nearly as important as simply throwing a big, loud, star-studded party. At its most relevant, the list offers genuine insight into the impressive, fickle and beguiling minds of contemporary kids. The full list is below, with some thoughts.
Favorite TV Show
iCarly
Sonny With a Chance
The Suite Life on Deck
Wizards of Waverly Place
No surprises there. Looks like my DVR screen.
Favorite TV Actor
Cole Sprouse
Dylan Sprouse
Joe Jonas
Nick Jonas
Sorry, Kevin Jonas. Marriage may agree with you, but with your fans? Not so much.
Favorite TV Actress
Miranda Cosgrove
Miley Cyrus
Selena Gomez
Keke Palmer
Quiz: Which are also professional singers with CDs in music stores? Answer: ALL OF THEM. Is it in the contract?
Favorite Music Group
Black Eyed Peas
Coldplay
Jonas Brothers
Linkin Park
Question: Is there such a thing as "kids' music" anymore?
Favorite Male Singer
Jay-Z
Sean Kingston
Mario
Ne-Yo
Answer: No.
Favorite Female Singer
Beyonce
Miley Cyrus
Lady Gaga
Taylor Swift
Except for Miley, these were all top Grammy winners. Kids know quality entertainment!
Favorite Movie
Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakuel
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
The Twilight Saga: New Moon
X-Men Origins: Wolverine
This is where the "kids know quality entertainment" argument begins to fall apart.
Favorite Song
"I Gotta Feeling," Black Eyed Peas
"Paparazzi," Lady Gaga
"Party in the USA," Miley Cyrus
"You Belong With Me," Taylor Swift
Which concerns you more -- when kids listen to Lady Gaga or when they look at her?
Favorite Movie Actor
Zac Efron
Taylor Lautner
Shia LaBeouf
Tyler Perry
Let’s play “Which one of these is NOT AT ALL like the others?”
Favorite Movie Actress
Sandra Bullock
Miley Cyrus
Megan Fox
Zoe Saldana
...But looks aren’t everything, right?
Favorite Cartoon
The Penguins of Madagascar
Phineas and Ferb
The Simpsons
SpongeBob SquarePants
I couldn't agree more. Site gags + smart gags = great entertainment, unlike some shows I know...
Favorite Reality Show
American Idol
Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?
So You Think You Can Dance?
Wipeout
Sorry, BrainSurge... and every other game or reality show specifically created for kids.
Favorite Female Athlete
Danica Patrick
Misty May Treanor
Serena Williams
Venus Williams
Are kids even watching the Winter Olympics?
Favorite Male Athlete
Kobe Bryant
LeBron James
Ryan Sheckler
Shaun White
To kids, Shaun White IS the Winter Olympics. By the way, Ryan is a 20-year-old skateboarder, but you knew that, right?
Favorite Video Game
The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks
Mario Kart Wii Fit
Wii Sports Resort
I wonder how many Wii controllers are broken by kids every year.
Favorite Book
"Diary of a Wimpy Kid" series
"Twilight" series
"Vampire Diaries" series
"Where the Sidewalk Ends"
Good news: There’s a category for books! Bad news: "Sidewalk" is 35 years old! There isn't a more recent book kids love? Oprah has some suggestions.
Favorite Animated Movie
A Christmas Carol
Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs
Monsters vs. Aliens
Up
Quiz: Which of these were released in 3D? Answer: ALL OF THEM. Is it merely coincidental that The Princess and the Frog was not in 3D and not nominated for a Kids' Choice Award?
Favorite Voice from an Animated Movie
Jim Carrey, A Christmas Carol
Seth Rogen, Monsters vs. Aliens
Ray Romano, Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinsosaurs
Reese Witherspoon, Monsters vs. Aliens
Three aging men and an eternally young-seeming little lady.
Cutest Couple
Edward & Bella (Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart)
Jacob & Bella (Taylor Lautner & Kristen Stewart)
Neytiri & Jake (Zoe Saldana & Sam Worthington)
President Barack Obama & First Lady Michelle Obama
President Obama's only shot here is to filibuster the vote.
Does Every Movie Needs Its Own Video Game?
Tiger Woods is so, so sorry y’all
Here’s Tiger Woods practicing his golf yesterday and nothing says “i greatly regret my penis’s wrongdoings” more than smiling from ear to ear at the thought of driving his dirty dozen of hookers as well as he did that golf ball. Or maybe he was just relieved Elin wouldn’t be at his press conference all prepped with her Viking horned helmet and a hammer just in case he had a tongue slip and gave away the name of another hooker we’ve yet to know and sure grow to love.
